Lunch With Sandy
Welcome to the "Lunch With Sandy" podcast, where we serve up candid conversations seasoned with humor and insight. Join us as we delve into much-needed discussions, sprinkled with our unique sense of humor. On the menu, you'll find a variety of topics, from conflict resolution to navigating tricky questions with grace. We also explore current events, sharing our perspectives on the everyday trials and triumphs. So pull up a chair, grab a plate, and enjoy the feast of conversation.
Lunch With Sandy
The Art of Translation: Decoding Your Partner's Words
Navigating the choppy seas of marital communication, Sandy and I get real about the true colors of verbal and nonverbal exchanges between partners. The nuances can be as subtle as the difference between an earnest "whatever you want" and a resigned one, and recognizing these shades of meaning can make or break understanding in a relationship. We don't shy away from gendered communication differences either—expect to hear about the bluntness often found in men's words versus the riddled expressions women may use.
Ever found yourself baffled by your partner's silence or those minimal responses that leave you guessing? We're right there with you, and in this episode, we're peeling back the layers of these nonverbal cues. From the importance of context in decoding your significant other's message to the peculiar ways indecision can reveal itself, our conversation is a treasure trove of insights. We'll even share some personal stories, like that time when choosing the right outfit or dealing with buyer's remorse offered a window into our relationship's dynamics.
Finally, we wrap things up by underscoring the pivotal role of empathetic listening and the journey to mastering the craft of heartfelt dialogue. Learning to interpret your partner's silent signals is an art form, one that flourishes with patience and empathy. The episode touches on the need for clarity in expressing emotions and trust as the cornerstone of impactful communication. Join us for this lunchtime deep dive where we bridge the gap between genders, tackle the distortions of digital communication, and advocate for the kind of earnest conversations that can only happen face-to-face.
In a relationship, when is honesty not the best policy? How do you balance what you want versus what you need, and is there something you need to say to your spouse but can't find the right way to say it? If so, then you're in the right place. This is the Lunch with Sandy podcast. With nearly 20 years of marriage under their belts, Terrance and Sandy Jackson discuss a range of topics, provide valuable insights on relationships and talk about the conversations married couples need to have. So what does lunch have to do with all of this? Well, it's a metaphor for how these conversations originally started. Speaking of conversations, let's get one going. Here's your hosts, Terrance and Sandy.
Terrance:Welcome to another episode of the Lunch with Sandy podcast, where we delve into various topics and offer insights from the perspective of a married couple I'm Terrance and I'm Sandy and today we're going to be discussing the hidden meaning behind some of the communication practices that Sandy has. But first, please be sure to follow the Lunch with Sandy podcast on your favorite podcast and app, and you can also follow us on all social media at lunch with Sandy. Speaking of Sandy, she's here with me.
Sandy:Present, present Goodness.
Terrance:What's going on?
Sandy:Uh, not much. I don't know if our listeners can tell our voices Well in our voices, because we had a late night last night and probably shouting over music, I feel like our voices both of us, are really hoarse.
Terrance:Listen, speak for yourself. I am too. Listen. It was a. It was a late night last night, but all in good fun.
Sandy:Yes, Um, Aila's still upstairs sleeping, she's going to have to get up soon, I know.
Terrance:We got places to be Not going to be out as late as it was last night.
Sandy:Oh, definitely not. I can't do two nights in a row.
Terrance:Not like that, Not like that. So, uh, we've had at nauseam a number of conversations or spoken about how effective communication is essential for any relationship, and it's important to remember that. You know, typically in a relationship there are two forms or two ways of communicating, and by that what I mean is there's the verbal and then there's the nonverbal.
Terrance:So it's important to be able to not only understand you know, the verbal cues, your partner may be putting out, but you also need to understand or learn those nonverbal cues that sometimes can put you in a situation that you need to actually be aware of. So let's tackle this basically from you know both those perspectives, and we'll start with you know the verbal what does?
Terrance:the Andy do. Well, we're going to get into that. We ain't there yet, but we're going to get into that. But you know, communication, when you're talking about it from the verbal perspective, normally seems pretty straightforward. Well, let me rephrase that it is supposed to be straightforward. But you know, everyone has their own way of communicating and everyone is different. So sometimes what is said is what is not meant.
Sandy:Those underlying.
Terrance:Yeah, well, I mean intentions. Sometimes I often wonder, particularly with Sandy, if she knows what it is that she's trying to say.
Sandy:But probably only like 45% of the time.
Terrance:So I'm glad you said that, because my first question to you was going to be this Do you think you always say what you mean?
Sandy:You're taking way too long to answer that because I, you know, I feel like it also kind of depends on context, Like the setting that we are in the context. If I always say what I mean, I don't even know what to do.
Terrance:I don't mean so I guess I understand that I can provide an example. Go ahead.
Sandy:That makes it easier. So if we're talking right, like in, you need me to help you make a decision, or whatever, like hey, I was thinking about doing this or what do you think about this? Instead, and then I'll say like, oh, whatever you want, you know what I mean. I literally mean whatever you want, Like it doesn't make a difference to me. But you know, if we're discussing and maybe not seeing eye to eye on something and it's you know. I don't want to say arguing, because you know we don't argue much, but well, actually I guess we don't fight much, but we do disagree. That's a better term.
Terrance:I'd have to agree to disagree.
Sandy:Yeah. So if we're just disagreeing and we're not seeing eye to eye and I'm like whatever you want, like that's me giving up, you know what I mean, so it's. So I feel like context in the situation is very key. So, you know, in the second situation I'm saying whatever you want, but to me it's not, it's I just give up. It's really what my, my underlying meaning is.
Terrance:So the basis is sometimes you have to have your secret decoder ring actually decode what actually is being said you know, in a lot of cases where people say whatever you want, they don't really mean whatever you want.
Sandy:It's one of those things where if someone says whatever you want, they're just saying eh right, and so I feel like the majority of the time when I say whatever you want, I literally mean sure, whatever you want. But if it's a situation where we're not seeing eye to eye, this is causing disagreement by whatever you want. So maybe that 5% means I give up 5%.
Terrance:I think that when we start talking about verbal communication, men and women are different in a lot of ways and, again, everyone is different. But I think from the male perspective, or at least from me, my communication is very direct, and by that what I mean is, if I say something, that's exactly what I mean, right, and I think that, particularly with you, most of the time that's the case. Well, let me take a step back Some of the time. That's the case, because sometimes you say some things and I don't even know if you know what you mean when you say it. But there's also the aspect of like, if I ask you something or if I ask for your input on something, you do this thing where I always interpret it and I know what the answer is. If I ask you something and you don't respond, then the answer is no.
Sandy:I take that as a no all the time, but that's not accurate it might not be accurate, but at the same time we've had this conversation a number of times and I told you that when you don't respond to me, that's a response and I take that as a no.
Sandy:Right, and so I have clarified with you that it does not mean no, it means I'm working out things in my own brain. I haven't really come to a decision if I don't say anything, but at the same time I have also said I'll try to give you some verbal communication.
Terrance:Yes, you gotta start doing that, Because I know you say it doesn't mean no, but at the same time it continues to happen and so in my defense, I'm a very internal person.
Sandy:Like I talk to myself often, I'm always working things out in my brain, I don't know when. I never really grew up talking about my feelings and talking through things, so that outward verbal communication is it doesn't come easy to me.
Terrance:I'm gonna help you with that. I'm gonna help you with that. Here's what you say. I'll get back to you on that.
Sandy:Yeah, there you go. I know simple and sweet, right I'll get back to you on that. But to me it's like my brain just starts automatically thinking Do you know what I mean? And then I just it's not intentional. I honestly just forget to say, okay, I'll get back to you.
Terrance:I think that there are some common phrases and I don't know if it's because over time, so many people have used them, and when I'm saying people right now I'm talking about women. I think there's some common phrases that when men hear women say something, the meaning behind what they say, the meaning behind what they're saying, isn't the same. Like, for instance, if I ask you something and you say maybe, maybe's no, maybe's no, or here's the big one. The big one is if I ask you is everything okay? And you say it's fine.
Sandy:I think that's a specific one again for the context of the situation.
Terrance:Granted. Context does play a role in that, but for the most part I would say the overall. If you were to poll people overall, men, overall, they would say, oh, she says she's fine, she ain't fine, she's pissed, she's pissed that and Right, like am I avoiding you?
Sandy:And then you come ask me is everything okay? And I'm like I'm fine. Yeah, that's probably does not mean I'm fine.
Terrance:Yeah, context is important, and I think there's one or two questions that women ask. They ask the question but it's not really the question that they wanna ask, or it's just asking the question for some form of confirmation, and it's always this one and it's this when we did the episode about honest communication. Stop asking, guys. Does this make me look fat?
Sandy:So I don't ask that, but I do ask how do I look?
Terrance:Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sandy:And it could be in either way. It could be like I'm indecisive about this outfit.
Terrance:You're indecisive about a lot of things, but go ahead.
Sandy:So thanks, honey. Or like fishing for a compliment?
Terrance:And that's the other thing.
Sandy:So one of the two you can. Honestly you can just put, like any Webster dictionary, definition one, definition two. So, okay, first, is it, sandy is indecisive, like let me maybe ask some questions to get to that answer? Okay, no, she's not indecisive, she's just looking for a compliment.
Terrance:But here's the difference where we communicate. Sandy, you look wonderful. Yes, because you know me, I'm very literal and I tell you all the time you look fine, you gotta wear what you like, yeah.
Sandy:But, yeah, I like to wear what I like on me, that you like too, unfortunately for you, like I wouldn't have bought it if I didn't like it, so hence, well, I don't that's again you know, that's not.
Terrance:That's a different episode.
Sandy:That's not always the case.
Terrance:I do think there are a lot of things that you buy just because you might see it in a moment and you're not decisive about it, and you decide to actually get it. And then, once you have it, you have it, and then when it comes time to actually put it on, then that's when you're indecisive and you gotta decide whether or not you like it.
Sandy:I've gotten a lot better at that. That's why I really need to upgrade my closet wardrobe, because I'm so bad at just shopping and I try not to just buy stuff, just to buy it anymore.
Terrance:Yeah, one last statement, or one last piece when we start talking about the verbal communication and this is not just for you, but I'm gonna I'm gonna Attach it to you because you do this a lot- Please. Let me know, I just need 10 minutes. That's not true.
Sandy:Oh, forgetting ready.
Terrance:That's not true. It's never 10 minutes.
Sandy:I don't know. Yesterday I did pretty good. I said I'll be ready by the time you get home, and what I was.
Terrance:Oh, you're talking about when I got back from the Western. I mean well you weren't ready because Jack's hadn't taken the dog out to use the bathroom.
Sandy:I didn't realize he needed to go out.
Terrance:Really you were leaving the house for.
Sandy:I was in the shower. We were gone for six hours. I thought maybe you had already did that.
Terrance:No, because you sent me to go pick up the food, but before that, what you could have asked? I didn't, you didn't communicate, I didn't.
Sandy:Neither did you. You could have texted me like, hey, while I'm gone, take Jack's out. See, it goes both ways.
Terrance:It doesn't go both ways, because you know what. You have a dog, just like I have a dog, and you're leaving the house you should be, you know what. Let me just take him out. Even if I took him out, let me just take him out. So he goes to the bathroom.
Sandy:Okay, whatever you want.
Terrance:There you go, there you go.
Sandy:But you know, the maybe, I feel like the maybe. I don't use the maybe on you, I use the maybe on the kids. Yeah, no, but they were growing up all the time and that was because it didn't mean no, it's because I'm not going to answer this question without daddy.
Terrance:Again. Now let's talk about using the decoder ring. So, rather than maybe you know what, I have to have a conversation with someone, so let me get back to you.
Sandy:Which is funny because that's I have gotten more into the habit of doing that with Ayla. She asked me a question last night. For the life of me I can't even remember what it was and I said that's a. Oh, I remember what it is now, but anyhow, I was like that's a question to ask to daddy and I together. So it wasn't a. Maybe it was. Bring it up one word together.
Terrance:And that's how it should be. So I mentioned earlier that there are two ways we communicate, and we talked a little bit about the verbal communication. So I want to hit on the nonverbal aspect for a minute. But just like the verbal cues, nonverbal cues well, actually even more so than the verbal cues nonverbal cues have to be decoded. There are some that are pretty straightforward when you talk about okay, well, this person is doing that.
Sandy:You know and you know what they mean. I'm pretty sure I know mine, yeah.
Terrance:Well, wait, listen. So what are some nonverbal cues that you've regularly used?
Sandy:So again, it's like context is everything and the conversation. I feel like so if we're having a conversation right and it's not like you just asked me a question and I go silent because you know my brain is trying to like work itself out, if we're either disagreeing something or we're trying to like work through something and I go silent, then that probably just means like I need to step away from this conversation. And if I do go silent and walk away, that means I really need to get out of this conversation. The walking away means like I need 10 minutes, but not those kind of 10 minutes to get ready, and it's not 10 minutes.
Sandy:It depends.
Terrance:It's normally a lot more than 10 minutes. Yeah, so you know me. I just stopped talking. I don't walk away. Yeah, Non-communicate.
Sandy:You just get the one word answers.
Terrance:Yep very minimal conversation.
Sandy:What do you want for dinner? I don't care.
Terrance:No, it's chicken.
Sandy:The answer to that is always chicken.
Terrance:There are some things that you know. There's some straightforward, non-verbal communications that are easy to pick up, Like if you're sitting here with your arms crossed and you got a screw face on.
Sandy:So my arms crossed do not mean anything, but I'm cold.
Terrance:But there was an added piece to that. I said you had a screw face on. It means your face is mad. You know angry face.
Sandy:Yeah, but I feel like sometimes you think I have a screw face on and it's.
Terrance:I'm just in my own head again Fix your face, I'll fix my face. No, listen.
Sandy:You all heard it in here first Fix your face.
Terrance:Listen, I know when you're in your head, because you do this thing with your lips. When you're in your head, when you're thinking, you do. That's part of your non-verbal communication. When you do this you think it.
Sandy:Well, that's good to know that I do that.
Terrance:You do it all the time.
Sandy:Aila says I just start staring and she thinks I'm staring at her.
Terrance:Yeah, because you do. You'll be looking directly at her.
Sandy:But I'm not, I'm like, but I am not looking. But it's funny because I'm not seeing her, like I'm not actually looking at her, my mind has kind of gone elsewhere. I'm just like thinking, and I'm just, my eyes are looking in one direction, but I don't see anything that's actually in front of me.
Terrance:Yeah, there's some non-verbal stuff that you do. That's not easy to actually decode but, like I said, the staring. I don't know what you're doing If I'm staring at you.
Sandy:It's because I'm not staring at you.
Terrance:But there's some typical ones, and this is not necessarily you, but when people avoid others, like I said, facial expressions you can tell a lot from the facial expressions, body language, things like that and I think it comes down to you have to know who it is you're in a relationship with. You got to learn those things from those from your partners, and that happens over time. But you got to learn them because if you don't, you end up putting yourself in a situation where you can be in a whole lot of hot water.
Sandy:Without even knowing.
Terrance:Yeah yeah, like I said, it takes time for you to actually come to learn those things. So the question becomes how do you get to that point? How do you get to a point where you've come to know what it is that your partner's trying to relay, when they ain't saying?
Sandy:I feel like practice makes perfect. I think over time, you just if you're paying attention to your partner, you are going to automatically learn some of those things.
Terrance:Yeah, we've talked about this before, but I think it's important to be open and honest when communicating. Yeah, because you may look at or you may take a non-verbal cue or something that someone, your partner, says and completely misinterpret it and that can be an issue. But if you have that open and honest communication, you can have a conversation about it. And then, when you have the conversation about it, then you can get to the root of the issue if there is one or understand that this is just me.
Sandy:And I think the other thing is don't assume that your partner has picked up on those Like.
Sandy:I can't believe he doesn't realize how upset I am or something. I think that's something that we've worked on too, where if I do walk away or whatnot, I'll you know once I calm down and my emotion is out of it. You know, because I feel like that when you try to talk through things in emotion and still in it, that sometimes it'll just precipitate another argument. But I'll be like you really upset me when you said blank, yeah, you know, you gotta say huh what, I didn't say that.
Terrance:No, I think it's important too, you know. Just based off that, you gotta be empathetic to each other. You gotta be able to put yourself in each other's shoes, and that way you can understand what that person may or may not be feeling at that particular time.
Sandy:Yeah, and how really important is it? I feel like now, as years have passed, I look back and I'm like you know what? It's not even important anymore.
Terrance:Yes, you're talking about communication, learning communication ain't important, no, not communication, but like something that we might be disagreeing on or whatnot.
Sandy:It's like, you know, in the whole scheme of things, is it really that important? And I'm thinking like no, it's not, like we spent you know time disagreeing about I don't know X. I can't really think of anything specific at this moment in time but it's like wow, at the end of the day, it's just. It's like as long as you're invested in each other, it ends up all working out anyways.
Terrance:Yeah, I think all I think, based on what I said earlier too with you know, having that open and an honest communication, part of the way that you get there is building trust with each other. So you have that openness and once you have that trust too, you know, when you start talking about different situations, if you trust that your partner wouldn't intentionally put you in a situation where you feel whatever way that it is that you actually feel, then you have that to lean back or to pull back and say, hey, listen, maybe I need to look at this from a different perspective. Maybe I need to have a conversation. Maybe I might be in my own head and I need to take 10 minutes which is normally not 10 minutes to go work that out and then come back and see what the situation really is.
Sandy:Yeah, no, I agree because I feel like maybe in the past I would take certain commentary like you're purposely trying to hurt my feelings and I've come to recognize that that's not the intention, because I do trust you and I know that you're not purposely trying to hurt my feelings Like this chicken tastes horrible.
Terrance:And that's just me being honest, that's just because to you.
Sandy:The chicken tastes horrible, like it's not anything to do with. You know my skills as a cook. Something happened with that chicken today that it just did not come out right. Yeah yeah.
Terrance:Listen and so my from me again. When it comes to communicating, I'm very direct, and if the chicken tastes horrible, I feel it's part of my duty to let you know. Hey, listen, this chicken, though, tastes good, this chicken is horrible.
Sandy:Yeah, I know and it's you know. It's just like anything else and I know we've talked about it in a past episode, but you kind of bring that baggage with you from prior situations and sometimes it just takes the time to know that you know to trust the person and know that you're that. Yeah, it's just you being direct and you're not trying to be hurtful.
Terrance:Yeah, and I think at the same time, too, I think you have to be able to listen and observe your partner, because sometimes things are gonna be said that aren't said.
Sandy:Yeah, well, it's like if I saved over that they're still for two hours and then you'll like the chicken is horrible. Like, at least appreciate the time that I spent freaking, making the damn chicken. Listen.
Terrance:I appreciate the time you put into the chicken, but this shit is horrible.
Sandy:Yeah, exactly, perfect yeah.
Terrance:And you know, the thing about it is you know, I always again, it's not always said, but I always appreciate the effort that you put in. But at the same time, I think it's important to you know, be mindful of the fact that, even though, when you're communicating directly, not everyone also communicates that way. So when you do that, you can have a negative impact on the person who you're communicating with. True, that's not that I don't appreciate you making the nasty chicken, it's just nasty.
Sandy:And I feel like I've learned through my life who those people are that are just direct, yeah, and they're not trying to intentionally hurt somebody's feelings, they're just calling it like it is yeah, yeah to when you're in a relationship to make sure or to get to where you're trying to go together.
Terrance:Communication is very, very important. I think that there are certain things that you should have a strategy or a plan for when you're talking about how you're gonna communicate.
Sandy:Right.
Terrance:Because you get involved with someone and now you see this plan at, or this path that lays out in front of you. Right, okay, maybe you plan on getting married or being lifelong partners, or however you wanna call it. Finances are gonna come into the picture. Now you start talking about money, things can get a little iffy. So how are you gonna communicate with each other when you start talking about the finances you may want to have or you may wanna build a family? You gotta have that communication and it has to be clear, because if one person wants kids and the other person doesn't want kids and they don't know how to effectively communicate, that you might be going down a path where you think someone may be on the same page with you and they may not be.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:The other. You know there's just a whole bunch of other stuff that comes along with. Okay, well, move in together. So if you can have a plan for how you're going to communicate when you start talking about those things and I think the first part of that plan is actually talking about those things- yeah, so I think, first of all, you don't start the conversation, as we need to talk. Oh yeah, that's the other thing you know what and the thing with that is too.
Sandy:Do not so, cause that's just gonna automatically, like you know, you'll stir up instantaneously Everybody's defensive.
Terrance:It's so funny that you said that because you know. Going back to verbal, you know the verbal aspect. There's a different meaning behind when you say we need to talk, everyone knows what that means. When you say we need to talk, all right, that's it. Something's over.
Sandy:Right, like all right, this is gonna be right or this is gonna be an argument already.
Terrance:Yeah.
Sandy:You know. Hence, yeah, walls are up, defenses are up, like there's really no, there's gonna be nothing good that, I feel like, is gonna come out of that conversation if you start with that tagline.
Terrance:Yep, Shanty, remove that phrase from your vocabulary.
Sandy:Well. So and this is where I find it difficult, and it would be nice to have the perspective of more of a newer couple, cause I feel like we've been together so long like I don't even remember how we initiated those conversations like how do you do that today, zane? I'm not sure, but I think it's like, like you said, kind of just communicating and almost like preparing. Like you know, I think we need to start, I think we need to have maybe some difficult conversations. So let's relax ourselves, let's go in the hot tub with a drink you know what I mean and kind of set the mood as we decide to have these difficult conversations I would just take the word difficult out there.
Terrance:I'd say you know, with some things we probably should discuss, you know what?
Sandy:I mean, yeah, let's go in the hot tub with a drink.
Terrance:I think, regardless of how long you've been together, I think the simplest approach is you know these things exist right, or these things are going to happen, or these things are going to come about. You start having conversations about okay well, how are we going to do A if B happens? I think it's important for everyone to start having those conversations as soon as you start to get serious. I mean, you don't want to meet somebody you know the first day and be like oh listen, so you know I want to have a baby, so we got to start planning this out. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You know, I mean that may work for some people, but some other people you're probably going to send them running out of the room.
Sandy:I'm 25 and I want to have a baby by the time I'm 28. So what's your intentions here.
Terrance:It's a woman thing. When I say that's a woman thing, I mean that that's something that I've heard women say, Not that guys don't want that, but I never hear a guy actually speak it.
Sandy:Well, his guys can have kids, no matter what age they are. Women have the more medical behind it.
Terrance:Well, no, and what I mean is I'm not saying that guys don't have those same feelings. They don't verbalize it again, that's. I think that's one area where women are more direct than some guys.
Sandy:Yeah well, I think it's honestly because of the underlying knowledge of the body, mechanics of it all. You know what I mean Nobody.
Terrance:No, I get it. The underlying body mechanics.
Sandy:I don't know how else to kind of describe it but like you know, women, we feel like we're on a clock to some degree, right Like hey, at some point we run out.
Terrance:Yeah, and it's funny because that I feel in those cases women are more direct. But at the same time, I start thinking about okay, well, research has shown that when women communicate they're not as direct because there's so many different aspects of what they're thinking when they're actually having those conversations.
Sandy:Yeah, or you know it's funny because, yeah, you're right, it could just be a type A personality that has their whole life planned out. Like okay, bob, I'm having a kid and Bob 32, I'm doing this and you know, some people have that.
Terrance:Were you like that? No, and he said 32 of these. I like how you did the thing with your hands. 32, or is it?
Sandy:No, but I did kind of have like a little mini corner life crisis, I feel like at 25, but other than that, it's funny because you know we will sit here and talk about how women communicate, how men communicate verbally, non-verbally, and again everybody is different.
Sandy:Yeah, it's really not a women and men thing, but I feel like you're right. It tends to be. The majority that at least we've come in contact with tend to fall under these categories. But yeah, well you know, men are from Mars, women are from Venus, Like there's a whole book about it.
Terrance:Yeah, well, you know, as time goes on there, I think communication is only going to get harder, because you know we talk about verbal communication. I think that's going to be a loss art eventually.
Sandy:Oh yeah.
Terrance:Because the way that so many people in the digital age right now communicate a lot of it is through social media apps or text, and the thing with those things is you can't always capture context in those things.
Sandy:I realize that I come off very. I don't even know what the right word is, but maybe hurtful, but not.
Terrance:I'm not trying to be In your text. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sandy:I feel like, cause I don't know why, but I guess because I'm very so, cause I actually have the chance, I guess, to think about the words that I'm using and it's not what would be in my natural conversation that people take it as harsher than it's really intended, as you know what I mean.
Terrance:Yeah, I don't have that issue, and I'll tell you why. I am a face to face communicator.
Sandy:Yeah, same.
Terrance:I don't use at work. I seldom use the phone. I seldom. I have people who work for me who are 20 feet away from me that will send me a message in Teams, as opposed to come and ask me a question or to give me that information.
Announcer:Yeah.
Terrance:Not me when they say it's funny, like someone will reach out to me in Teams and I'll just lean over and start yelling. Hey, no, we don't wanna do that.
Sandy:No, I'm more of a face to face person too, and so that's when I think I try to take it. If there's been a few occasions, I'll say I've taken it to written word and it never ends up working out right. Yeah, it never ends up working out the way that it's intended, and I feel like I always end up hurting somebody's feelings again which is not intentional, and then I'm apologizing for hurting their feelings, that that's not what was intended.
Terrance:But they decoded it that way. But they decoded it that way, when you go and you have a conversation with someone and you can look them in the eye and you can see their facial expressions, you get all those cues because some of that stuff is it's non-verbal. You're communicating verbally, but those non-verbal cues that you pick up on is gonna give you an indication.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:About how they're receiving what it is that you're actually saying yeah. As we wrap up, remember that communication is a two-way street. It's not just about speaking. It's about truly listening and understanding. Each one of us brings our own unique communication style to the table, and it's our job to learn and appreciate those differences. So, whether it's deciphering the unspoken words conveyed through body language, or fostering empathy and trust to facilitate open dialogue, let's commit to understanding each other better. Let's create spaces where honesty thrives, trust blossoms and communication becomes a bridge rather than a barrier. Thank you for joining us on the Lunch with Sandy podcast. Please be sure to follow us and leave feedback on your favorite podcasting app. Until next time, stay well.
Announcer:That's it for this week's episode of the Lunch with Sandy podcast. Thanks for listening. We'd love to hear your feedback and comments on Instagram, tiktok and Twitter at Lunch with Sandy, and be sure to follow us on your favorite podcast app. If you enjoyed the show, don't forget to rate and review us. Thanks again for listening to the Lunch with Sandy podcast.
