Lunch With Sandy
Welcome to the "Lunch With Sandy" podcast, where we serve up candid conversations seasoned with humor and insight. Join us as we delve into much-needed discussions, sprinkled with our unique sense of humor. On the menu, you'll find a variety of topics, from conflict resolution to navigating tricky questions with grace. We also explore current events, sharing our perspectives on the everyday trials and triumphs. So pull up a chair, grab a plate, and enjoy the feast of conversation.
Lunch With Sandy
The Secrets to Seamless Family Outings
Every time we pack our bags and herd the kids into the car, Terrance and I brace for the beautiful chaos that is a family vacation. This episode is no exception, as we recount the whirlwind of emotions and the lessons learned from our latest adventure. We tackle everything from the anticipation of departure to the reality of post-travel blues and sniffles. Listen in as we get real about flying with kids, the unexpected dynamics of bringing new family members along for the ride, and the bittersweet growth of our daughter Aila, whose changing perspectives on travel remind us that these moments are fleeting.
Terrance and I have become quite the maestros of mapping out stress-free family excursions, and in this episode, we’re letting you in on our secrets. We navigate the logistics from timing road trips to perfection, balancing nap schedules, and choosing destinations with family-friendly rhythms in mind. We also reflect on the evolution of our travel methods, trading in the steering wheel for alternative transportation in pursuit of a smoother journey. Join us as we dissect the anatomy of a great vacation, where patience is not just a virtue, but a travel essential.
Remember the days of threatening to turn the car around? We sure do. Our final chapter takes you along on our most memorable road trip escapades, divulging how humor became our saving grace amidst the backseat bickering. We share tips for keeping the peace, like rotating seating arrangements and embracing the unpredictability of the open road. And as Ayla's 14th birthday approaches, we're reminded that these trips aren't just about reaching a destination but creating precious memories with every mile. So tune in, and let's celebrate the journey and the destinations that bring our families closer together.
In a relationship, when is honesty not the best policy? How do you balance what you want versus what you need, and is there something you need to say to your spouse but can't find the right way to say it? If so, then you're in the right place. This is the Lunch with Sandy podcast. With nearly 20 years of marriage under their belts, Terrance and Sandy Jackson discuss a range of topics, provide valuable insights on relationships and talk about the conversations married couples need to have. So what does lunch have to do with all of this? Well, it's a metaphor for how these conversations originally started. Speaking of conversations, let's get one going. Here's your hosts, Terrance and Sandy.
Terrance:Welcome to another episode of the Lunch with Sandy podcast, where we discuss various topics and provide insights from the perspective of a married couple. I'm Terrance and I'm Sandy, and today we're going to be talking about family vacations. But before we get into that, please remember to follow the Lunch with Sandy podcast on your favorite podcasting app. Also, be sure to follow us on social media at lunch with Sandy Sandy. Yes, what it do what it be. Oh, you know, you a little tired from your party last night.
Sandy:It was just a very rough week this week.
Terrance:It was.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:You have to go through those rough weeks.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:You know, the funny thing is, it always seems like after you go on a vacation.
Sandy:It's the worst.
Terrance:The week when you get back. It's a very rough week.
Sandy:Yeah, and then my personal experience of getting sick from coming back from vacation, I should say, and then getting sick. It really, really put me behind, but listen.
Terrance:You know the opposite, or the alternative to getting sick when you come back, it's getting sick while you're on vacation.
Sandy:Oh yeah, that's that I'd prefer. Always prefer to get sick after my vacation than during.
Terrance:Vacations are. Well, it depends on what the vacation and where it is, because we both got sick, but the sickness that I got it was I was sick in January and the doctor thought that everything was cool, but on vacation I was good.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:I had no problems while I was on vacation. The challenge was coming back to that 23 degree weather and that that weather just hit me in the chest and it said welcome home.
Sandy:Yeah right, I know, for me it was the opposite. I did not feel well on vacation you know the worst migraine I had had in a very long time and it just lingered all vacation. But at least it wasn't to where I was sick in bed and couldn't function. You know, I got that when I came home.
Terrance:Yeah, well, yeah, it was a welcome home present.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:Rhode Island said we missed you. Welcome home and now that you're here, take this.
Sandy:Oh no, I was thinking it was more of a Florida present, like don't forget about us.
Terrance:Well, I mean, don't say that because I got to go back in June. I think part of it too is, you know, you got to keep it. Well, I don't know if you remember this or if you recall this. Here's what I'm thinking. On the flight back, there were two kids behind us and one of them kept coughing and not covering his mouth.
Sandy:Yeah, and that's the thing, and I think this is why I'll probably always wear a mask while on and going forward because it's not like we don't know that it's just an incubator of germs while you're on it, so like, why am I not doing it? Because, honestly, it's been twice since I've gotten sick from flying to Florida.
Terrance:I want to know what's funny. So I got back, I had to go to the doctor and you know the doctor's assistant. It's funny because they were in Florida the exact same time. We were Differences. We came back on Friday, they came back on Monday and she said the whole time her kids was fine. Got back on Monday, her kids go to school, boom, instantly.
Sandy:They're sick.
Terrance:They're sick.
Sandy:Well, honestly, even on the flight down there, I was like maybe I should wear a mask Because they're right. So on the flight down we sat towards the back of the plane.
Terrance:Yeah, we had no choice, but yeah.
Sandy:Right, but all I could hear is like the coffin, the sneeze in, like just everything and I'm like, oh great, like this is just room for disaster. But the flight coming home, we were towards the front of the plane, so all that coughing and everything was happening behind us. Where the flight down, it was in front of us. So yeah, I wouldn't.
Terrance:Yeah, well, enough about the downside of vacation. We had a great vacation.
Sandy:We did.
Terrance:It was one of those vacations where I think that we might have did more than we said we originally were going to do, but it still turned out to be a pretty good vacation and we learned something this vacation. Unfortunately, we learned that Aila is not really big into vacationing when it's just us anymore.
Sandy:Yeah, I don't know, she's at that age now where it's like eh Well, and I, honestly, I went into this vacation not knowing how it was going to go because, you know, we had two extra individuals with us that we've never vacationed with before.
Terrance:Yeah, but I knew that wasn't going to be a problem.
Sandy:But you know like we all get along fine, you know, but having family dinners and just hanging out is much different than vacationing with people. So I was like you know, you just never know how, how well you're going to mesh during vacation. So I was like I think we'll be all right, but just never know what you're in for it, but it turned out actually to be wonderful.
Terrance:You want to know. The funny thing is, our vacation game has definitely grown since the early days and it's funny that you talk about, you know, not knowing how things are going to go. I think when we look back and we start talking about vacations and how we do it now, there are different phases or different things that you can do to make sure that you have an enjoyable experience when you go on vacation and I think the biggest part of that, or the biggest thing that you can do to make sure that you have a good time, is planning for the vacation.
Terrance:And when I say planning for the vacation, I'm not talking about planning what you're gonna do once you're down there. I'm talking about getting your mind right, getting everything set up, so when the time comes, it's just go.
Sandy:Yeah, well in. I think practice makes perfect.
Terrance:Yeah, learn from your mistakes, and we've had a lot of practice.
Sandy:Yes, we've had a lot of practice. Learn from your mistakes.
Terrance:Absolutely.
Sandy:And I think the other one is just kind of know what stage you're at and what your family needs to make it a successful trip.
Terrance:Yeah.
Sandy:Is that multiple naps? I don't know. Just like you just have to figure out what's gonna make everybody happy.
Terrance:You just said something right now Multiple naps.
Sandy:And exactly.
Terrance:The multiple naps to me for a loop, because our youngest is 14.
Sandy:Well, our youngest is gonna be 14. I need the naps now and I'm like multiple naps.
Terrance:Who is she talking?
Sandy:about Me. So I'm talking about me. I need the multiple naps, I think they're.
Terrance:in the past, I think we've done a very good job for the most part. When we started talking about vacationing and I'm talking about from where to go- yeah. Right, because when you decide to go on a vacation, where you're going plays a big role in that.
Sandy:Definitely.
Terrance:But you know what also plays a big role when you go.
Sandy:Yes, yes.
Terrance:So if you choose to go to a place for your vacation and you know it is a high value place when I say high value I mean there are gonna be a lot of people who are going to be at this spot because it's one of those spots you gotta be very careful when you go. You gotta plan to go during the non-peak seasons because if-.
Sandy:Unless you like being around all those people.
Terrance:Well, I mean the thing about it is people can be very, very stressful and when you have a lot of them around, I think it detracts from your vacation and I think every bone's vacation is a little different. Everyone's idea of what an ideal vacation is is a little different. But when you look at let's take the last vacation out, let's look at one of the places we used to go all the time with Split Rock.
Sandy:Yep.
Terrance:We've gone to Split Rock during peak season and we've gone during off season, and the off season always is better, and Split Rock is not one of those places where you get an enormous amount of people, but you do get a lot of people during their peak season. The experience that you get when it is off season is so much more relaxing because you have a lot more stuff to yourself. Right, you're not vying for position, whether it be at the indoor water slides, whether it be at the, you know, the archery range or whatever.
Sandy:Yeah, Wait time and line time is just shorter. You know the ice cream shop. You might have a couple of people in front of you. It's not like a line out the door, yeah.
Terrance:And you know the other thing that you know. I said we've stepped our vacation game up. A lot of vacations we used to go on, we used to drive. Now, when you're driving on a vacation, there are some things that you need to factor in or you need to take into account or you need to consider in order for that drive to be less stressful. And I think one of the biggest things is when you're going to leave. Again, it's hard to predict what traffic is going to be like and certain well, let me take a step back Now. It's much easier to predict what traffic is going to be like in areas that you don't normally travel in. But when the kids were younger, the older kids, when they were younger, and we would go on vacations, you listen, you get your map, you print it out, because GPS wasn't readily available for everyone, and you would be at the mercy of whatever traffic you came upon.
Terrance:So when you left, or when you decided to leave, it was very important, because that's how you would avoid traffic in specific areas.
Sandy:In which way you would go. Because back then we used to do more of the scenic, non-traffic routes, just because we knew, if we get stuck in that traffic, who wants to spend so much time driving in the car if they don't have to? So we used to take a little longer, go more of the scenic route, knowing that it really wasn't going to be impacted by traffic.
Terrance:Yeah, and that planning that, planning that route and that scenic route helped us tremendously. Because when you planned that route, when we used to plan that route, we knew what everyone's preference was. We knew we would be stopping and so the kids would look forward to all, right, well, we know we ain't getting out of the car here. Right, when we get here we're going to stop and we'll do this. And now you know.
Sandy:Wasn't it like the Pennsylvania Welcome Center? It was the Welcome Center.
Terrance:That was their stop. That was their stop. I mean, I would like to drive until we got to the Welcome Center, but then we would always start depending on the route that we would go. We would stop and obviously use the bathroom and then eventually we actually had to switch up that route. But when you can plan that route right and then you can schedule where you're going to actually have brakes at, it does break the trip up. It gives the kids who are always in the back seat are we there? Yet it gives them an idea of you know.
Sandy:Like a milestone.
Terrance:Exactly when we're going to stop, what we're actually going to do when we stop and you said this earlier you know when you're doing a road trip, you've got to have patience Because, again, you can't predict all the traffic that you're going to hit.
Sandy:You can't predict just everything, like the black bear that ran in front of our car that much Well, I mean. Like and we're like wow.
Terrance:That was a situation where I mean the kids were asleep, but at the same time yeah.
Sandy:There's just a lot of things that you just can't predict and you have to be patient and just figure out how to handle what I will say is and this is from the, not the.
Terrance:I don't know if it was the last New Hampshire trip, no, it wasn't the last one, the one before you need to pack an emergency or a preparedness kit. And when I say a preparedness kit, listen, you never know what's going to happen. Just be prepared, have some plastic bags back there, some towels, some wipes, all of that stuff, because when, as we've learned, the road trips that we've been doing lately have involved meeting up with other families and you know what happens when kids get together- it's like a peachy, a peachy dish of just germs.
Terrance:And it always seems like the germs actually hit when we're coming back.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:So in New Hampshire the last day Ayla gets sick.
Sandy:Ah, poor thing.
Terrance:Yes, and she's throwing up just before we leave, then she's throwing up in the car. So, being prepared which we wasn't for that trip.
Sandy:We were not.
Terrance:Being prepared. Lesson learned with that one. Yeah, the thing with those road trips and I go back to we're gonna go back to the Pennsylvania ones is it's one thing to prepare for the route and the stops and the things like that, but sometimes just getting out the house was a challenge, you know, between getting everyone's luggage, getting it in the car. If you remember when Lexi and Shayna was young, just getting all the stuff in the car was a challenge.
Sandy:I, you know, I take it even to step back and just even packing, because I oh yeah, for the most part, I was the one that was packing for all of us. I packed my own stuff. Well.
Announcer:I didn't mind it, but it was Lexi myself, shayna.
Sandy:Yeah, I'm always packing for everybody.
Terrance:Well, if you would have taught them to pack for themselves, we probably wouldn't have room to fit all their stuff anyway.
Sandy:I'm trying to teach A-Lah and yet I'm still, like you know.
Terrance:Well, the whole packing thing too is there's always a situation where, okay, did I forget anything? Yeah, is there something? That? Well, there's two things Did I forget to pack something and did I leave something? Yes, because you know, daddy, daddy's rule is whatever time we're leaving A-I-S ass in seat, that's the time we put, and if you leave something, you better deal with that.
Sandy:Well, I feel like we've been more flexible. I'll say Like I think we used to stress more about oh my God, did we leave something? Did we forget to pack something?
Announcer:Yeah.
Sandy:Unless it's the necessities, like park tickets, if you have them in paper or whatever it is you know. Other than that, I feel like now we're like, eh, we'll just get it when we get down there.
Terrance:Yes, that's true. Well, I mean part of that too is again, when you look at the trips we're taking now.
Sandy:Yeah, it's not where I stress We'll figure it out when we get there.
Terrance:Well, you know wisdom comes with age, and as you get older you figure out there are certain things that just aren't worth worrying about, right? You know what I mean.
Announcer:Look, if you forget, exactly, if you forget your toothpaste.
Terrance:just go buy some toothpaste, because think about it, think about it. We went to Italy last year and they lost our bags for a couple of days.
Announcer:Now, we didn't forget anything Almost a week.
Terrance:Yeah well, we didn't forget anything. But guess what? We had to go buy toothpaste. We had to go buy all that stuff, and we could have stressed about it. But what was that going to do? No exactly, it was only going to detract from the trip.
Sandy:Yeah, surprisingly we didn't. I was irritated, but I wasn't stressed by it, because once that first night I had a nice tube of toothpaste and a toothbrush to clean my teeth. It was like eh.
Terrance:Exactly. Do you remember the last road trip we took with all the girls?
Sandy:That was fun, yeah, I remember.
Terrance:It was the Virginia trip.
Sandy:It actually wasn't bad, it was just the traffic coming home.
Terrance:Well, the traffic coming home was bad, but if you remember the ride down now you got to remember Lexi and Shayna always had this thing when they're in the car. Yeah, don't touch me, don't touch me, don't talk to me, it was just yeah. Yeah, and so space with them was always an issue, and that last trip it was Especially the touching.
Sandy:You're too close to me.
Terrance:Move over that last trip. I think they were all in the backseat. They were all in the backseat and I think at some point they figured that this whole thing would end. But then Ayla comes along. And then Ayla comes along, and now you have three in the backseat again, and so the space is limited and now they're back in this whole. Oh, she's on my side and I don't want to sit in the middle, and it was just Don't make me turn this car around Exactly.
Terrance:It's so funny that that phrase became just such a phrase for everything. Don't make me turn this car around, I'll do it, but I think in order to survive a trip like that and we don't do too many road trips anymore, which, again, I don't have an issue with, although we got a hit split rock again but I think the thing that we probably could have done a better job at was setting the expectation, and I think we did that with our actions, like making those steps, the same steps, but at the same time using our words to say, okay, well, here's what we're going to do, this is where we're gonna stop, this is how I want you to sit. I don't wanna hear anything about this. You know what I mean. And then, at the same time, you know when we weren't as calm of parents back then as we are now, because the way we dealt with the conflicts and disagreements was just straight. Listen, don't make me come back there.
Sandy:So two thoughts. One is you're right Like we always included the kids in planning the vacation but we didn't talk much about, like in route to the vacation spot. So we probably didn't kind of set those expectations and talk enough about that, and I feel like that would have helped them. The other thing is it just makes me laugh because I think you're right we definitely did not have the same patient in which even this particular trip where the I just remember the looks that Alexi and Shayna were giving Ayla about I could never get away with that.
Terrance:You know, the thing about it is we're different now, and what I'm gonna do right now is I'm gonna say how we're different. So right now, as parents excuse me, right now as parents we use a lot more humor to diffuse situations, we are much more lenient from the perspective of the looks that we give, the tone in our voice, and we do a lot more talking, and when I say talking, I mean having a conversation of a collaborative, from the collaborative perspective to deal with the situations where we would yell and scream.
Sandy:That's just stopping at the situation.
Terrance:Where we would yell and scream in the past.
Sandy:Well, you know she is also the last one, so I think you just learn right. Like this stuff isn't that big of a deal, like the kids are gonna turn out fine if we don't do blank, yeah, yeah but yeah, going back to the last road trip, there was a couple of things that I learned.
Terrance:Well, hopefully that the kids learned, and I knew this, if you remember. So we went down to Virginia and, again, when you start to go south, it tends to be a lot warmer than it is when you're up North. And so, from the perspective of being prepared, from the dress perspective, you know, particularly when you're in the car, you wanna dress comfortably but at the same time you gotta be prepared because when you go down, it's warmer.
Terrance:When you come back it might not be, but at the same time, too, it's not always about the weather Going down. We didn't have any issues Coming back. We were in that car for a very, very long time. Yes, we were. That was the trip that made me say I am never driving to Virginia again.
Sandy:Well, yeah, we should have left at like one in the morning, we would have been fine.
Terrance:That. And the other part about that, too, is we should have told them all right, listen, after a certain amount of time we're gonna switch, we're gonna stop and switch seats, so we ain't gotta deal with the she's on my side or she's too close to me and all those other things. So for all those people out there, when you start talking about these road trips, you know there's a couple of things that we mentioned right, we talked about being prepared, making sure you have that emergency prepared kit, making sure your kids dress comfortably and at the same time, you gotta switch that seating up, depending on who you got. If it's just one back there, that's fine, but have you got three back there?
Sandy:Yeah right, well too. And the other thing is, like you know, like you said, planning out the, the communion, whatnot, you know, that road trip we let the girls probably sleep in. We left later, like not abundantly late, but it was later, you know. Had we cause? They're just cause you want them to sleep in the car anyhow? So, if we had left much earlier we probably missed out on a lot of the traffic that we got hit.
Terrance:We definitely would cause, if you remember.
Sandy:Cause, honestly, I rather do any road trip where I know that any kid that is in the back seat is gonna be sleeping. It makes it so much better.
Terrance:Yeah, if, if you remember that trip, we got to exit one in Connecticut at 12 PM, we got home at five, which is crazy. That's like two and a half three hours longer than it should have actually taken us and that traffic was ridiculous.
Sandy:It was. But you know what Another thing we should have learned? We should have just pulled off. The highway went in, I don't know.
Terrance:Well, if you remember, we pulled off and got gas. Well, we did that, but we didn't really, and that made it longer because of getting back on.
Sandy:But I mean, like we could have, you know, I guess, like waited it out a little bit, found something to do, I don't know even just called it a day, booked a hotel and just spend the night in. Connecticut. Well, you know and said, you know what, we'll deal with this in the morning.
Terrance:Yeah, and then you know. So the biggest difference between now and then, like, all of the accessories that are available today weren't available back then, correct? So when you start talking about surviving that trip, I mean for the parents it's just all right well, you gotta suck it up but for the kids it was horrible, because I think we might've had the little DVD things that they can play, but there were no iPads, there were no kindles or what is the fires and all that other stuff, the fires, the kindle fires. There's no tablets, they didn't have tablets.
Sandy:So today what you could do is there's the little Nintendo DSs and the DVD players. What was?
Terrance:that Well, and you know what. Actually they did have something, but today there are many more options that would help survive a actual ride like this. Not much for the parents. The parents gotta suck it up and just enjoy the view of the traffic if you get caught into it. But with kids you can have their tablets, books or whatever. But you really should plan ahead of time to make sure that if there's something from the perspective of movies or whatever that you need to download first, you get that stuff done first. And so, in a situation where your car ride is longer than you expect now, you got something to entertain them a little bit. What we used to do back in the day.
Sandy:Yeah, I think we're gonna go down the same route and I was gonna say I think the ideal situation would be. What we used to do was probably starting off with some of the games that we used to play in the car. And then having the electronics for when they start to really start getting bored.
Terrance:Yeah, and I think, depending on the kids, that'll work. I mean, I would always start with some of the games used to play in the car and what I mean, like the license plate game and all those other things. The question becomes whether or not kids today would be willing to get into that, and I think a lot of them would, because it's different. But I think that with the accessibility of all these different devices, the social aspect of what kids were then and what they are now have actually changed and I don't wanna spend too much time on that. But I think, besides doing or having all those devices and playing those games and we didn't, well, actually, you know, we used to do this I think, if you allow for a period of time and obviously with kids nowadays can't be too long, but if you allow for a period of quiet time while you're in the car, I used to play the quiet game.
Terrance:Listen, yeah, I know we used to play the quiet game all the time.
Sandy:I'm pretty sure Shayna always lost.
Terrance:Oh yeah, shayna lost all the time. Shayna will lose all the time. I mean, even we used to play with Aileen. Aileen will lose all the time. But if you allow for quiet time, that's one way that the parents actually can get a little break and survive a little easier. That's why I say kids are sweet.
Sandy:But not the endale situation. I think if we were to go on a road trip today, obviously our kids are younger. But if we had to go on a road trip with younger kids, it would be let's drive at four o'clock in the morning so they can just sleep.
Terrance:Well, you know what I think today we're. Well, I know for a fact today that we're much more different, right?
Terrance:So, if we were to go on a road trip today, we would know that everything's not gonna go according to plan Just from history, just from our experience, and I think that we will be much more open. Like back then I wasn't open to no sightseeing and no detouring Nah, I need to get where I need to go. We would be much more open to sightseeing and those things. So that'd be a little bit different. Like we're at that stage now where we understand that time is one of the only things that you know. We can't get back, and so if you have the opportunity, to go see something or explore something.
Terrance:Let's go do it.
Sandy:Right, like hey, we're stuck in traffic. I think the Connecticut situation was unusual because I don't think we really thought at some point well, I should say we probably did think at some point this traffic has to alleviate and it just didn't, it just didn't, and it didn't.
Sandy:So right, so like, okay, well, what's around us? Like to your point, we have so many options for technology, Like you know. Just pull up a map, what's near us, that you know something we'd like to do, just to get us out of the car, you know, do something, and then we'll finish attacking this drive home. But yeah, I think flexibility, I think in going with the flow, is such a big part of it keeping everybody sane and happy.
Terrance:Yeah, and I think now we look at it different right. I think now we look at okay, all of it as it's quality time together, as opposed to you know we're going here, we're going to do this, but getting there and coming back is not part of it.
Terrance:Right yeah, and I think that's a big adjustment in our mindset. I think now we more look at it from the perspective of the journey is just as important as the destination. Yes, the experiences that you have getting there are only going to enhance the experience that you have while there and vice versa on the way coming back. If you have that mindset, then your vacation is not just one. You get to wherever it is you're going and then that's it, it's. You start going down there. Your mindset is different. You understand that, hey, some things may happen Kumbaya, we're going to deal with it whatever way we can actually deal with it and just keep it moving. And I know for a fact I was not like that when we were going on vacation.
Sandy:I was definitely much more uptight and not flexible Now. Like think about it, when we did the trip to Portugal, we brought like a deck of cards and all of us were playing cards while we were waiting in the airport. Like to your point, it's part of the vacation, so there's no need to just put yourself consistently on stressful situations. Just enjoy your time together.
Terrance:You know the thing people need to get out and see the world. And I'm gonna say why I'm saying that because that trip to Portugal, that's when we started to change our mindset. The first one, that's when we started to change our mindset.
Terrance:We brought those cards partially because we knew that in certain places we weren't going to have access to the internet so we were going to have to find ways to actually entertain ourselves, and when you start thinking about how we actually interacted as a family on the trip there, because it was such a long time to get there, while we were there in those places that didn't have internet, if you, if you recall, as soon as we got to a place where we had internet, Everybody was kind of like everybody was off on their own, except for when we were in Abu Feta, because that there was so much going on.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:You know what I mean. That was so much of a touristy place and they had all the shops, they had the nightclub scene that the girls went to. So when you have things like that and a place where you haven't been before and it's so vibrant, that can actually draw your attention.
Sandy:Yeah.
Terrance:But the other places. Yeah, I remember when we got to your mom's place and she had that little wireless thing and all of a sudden we're all watching movies on our phones because in that place now again the difference between that place and the other places there wasn't a lot to do around there and we went for a lot of walks, we went to the cafe, you know, we did all that stuff which was part of our experience, but at as as nightfall came around, there was nothing to do.
Terrance:You don't get no TV. You don't get no you know TV stations or anything over there. So but that I think that trip really started us to start looking at things a little different. So when, when people plan these trips or people, people are planning vacations, planning the trip is one thing and there's some things that you want to take into consideration, but I think that you know, if you can make the entirety of the journey part of the vacation, you're gonna get a much more better experience out of it.
Sandy:Yeah, I know I agreed. Like you really have to just plan that accordingly too, like because the worst thing I think is, especially when you're flying right, getting all uptight, getting you know to the airport too late, running around and things of that nature Not that we ever really did that, but I feel like that adds so much stress and pressure to it. So you just have to recognize, like if I don't want that in my trip, then whatever I'm gonna get to the airport, maybe even an hour earlier than I really need to be, and you know what.
Sandy:That's fine let's just sit around and play some card games while we're waiting.
Terrance:Yeah, and that's what we got to start doing because, again, if you make it you said it if you make that part of your plan, yeah then the expectation is okay, this is what we're actually doing here. The one thing that we got to figure out is this, and I've said this Ayla didn't want a vacation with us, no more.
Terrance:I know she wanted to just be with her sisters and I think part of that too is, I think that from a planning perspective and from a, you know, an inclusivity perspective, we got to start having conversations with her and say okay, well, what do you want to do here? Or what's your interest in here?
Sandy:because again yeah she was gun whole with having her, her sisters there yeah she was also gun whole about having some other people there, and I think that when that didn't happen, it was kind of like yeah, well, and it was cute because I think the girls recognize that with Ayla too and they also recognize like we need to make more of an effort, yeah, to include her and do things with her, because she is at that age where she does want to hang out with them and not mom and dad.
Terrance:It's very sad and depressing yeah, I mean listen, I'm not gonna say that it's, I'm kidding about the sad and depressing, but it is just like. No, I mean, it's one of those things where you know I'm mindful of the fact that.
Terrance:Okay, well, her interests are shifting and you know you always wish you can hold on a little longer yeah, but that's why I say we have to take advantage of the opportunities that are actually presented to us and make sure that we take full advantage, or take advantage to the full extent that we can, because, again, eventually, yeah, they grow up and then they're gone, I mean gone out of the house right, right.
Sandy:People say it all the time that time flies, and I think for us it's like you know it, but then when it happens, it's like oh my goodness yeah, I can't believe that much time has actually already elapsed she's gonna be 14 in a couple of weeks. I know exactly and speaking like you know what.
Terrance:There's just stressors and things that just are not worth our time and in time anymore and speaking of, we were at a particular story yesterday and she made it clear what she wants for her birthday. She mentioned that to me today when I got home and I'm on the mindset now that you know what, regardless of what's going to happen in a year or two years, we have to decide if we want to take the leap and yeah do what?
Terrance:she's asking and I've been. Actually, I got a plan and you know, let's, let's wrap this up because I'm gonna tell you what my plan is afterwards. But, in short, you know, vacations are a great thing, but family trips, I mean, they can be a chaotic experience. But when you plan and you take into account where you're going, when you're leaving and all those things, that stuff can enhance your overall experience. And now it takes the vacation from okay, well, once you arrive at your destination and once you leave your destination to okay, well, as soon as our journey begins. Yep, our experience begins and we're gonna enjoy this trip the whole way. Sometimes the journey should be the destination, and having the ability to share that experience in the time, which your loved ones, fuels that journey. So embrace the twists and turns and unexpected detours, as it is those experiences that forge memories that are cherished forever. Thank you for joining us on the lunch with Sandy podcast. Please be sure to follow us and leave feedback on your favorite podcasting app, as well as social media.
Announcer:Until next time, stay well that's it for this week's episode of the lunch with Sandy podcast. Thanks for listening. We'd love to hear your feedback and comments on Instagram, tiktok and Twitter at Lunch with Sandy, and be sure to follow us on your favorite podcast app. If you enjoyed the show, don't forget to rate and review us. Thanks again for listening to the lunch with Sandy podcast.
